He Knows You’re Alone (1980)

At this point, they all start to run together.  Right now I’m dealing with dollar-store rip-offs of both Star Wars and Halloween; having just written a review of Battle Beyond the Stars, I have now landed at He Knows Your Alone.

Look, I get it.  You want to cash in.  There’s a popular entity out there floating in the zeitgeist that is attracting the masses like a moth to a flame.  There are financial opportunities.  My argument is, at least take what made those films special and try and replicate that.  Just the surface isn’t going to do it.  I’m more lenient on a movie that tries and fails than one that doesn’t try at all.

He Knows You’re Alone does try.  It is so inconsequential that I find myself having to write fast before it disappears from my memory.  All I remember while I was watching was realizing just how by-the-numbers it was, how much it wanted to be Halloween, or at least to have that kind of box office sleeper magic.  It can’t. It’s not that clever. 

What we have here is a movie that takes place before a wedding.  Years ago, a man was jilted by his fiancé and so he killed her the day before her wedding to someone else.  Years later, another bride-to-be is about to walk down the aisle.  This is apparently this killer’s M.O. – he kills young brides and the people in the wedding party.  The cop on the killer’s trail is the former fiancé of the woman who was murdered the year before.

You know what?  This movie is worthless.  Just skip it.  I’ve got things to do.  Later.