My Favorite Movies: The Original Star Wars Trilogy (1977-1983)
It is nearly impossible to see this as [...]
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Bright (2017)
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. This will not do. I’m sorry but no matter how you bend it, twist it, turn it, pull it or stretch it, the word ‘Orc’ just doesn’t work in a cop buddy movie. The fact that Bright – Netflix’s first attempt at a massive big-budget theatrical-style fantasy – […]
Warcraft (2016)
Some years ago, maybe around 2010, I recall standing in my den looking over my wife’s shoulder while she was playing a game on the computer. I asked what she was playing; “World of Warcraft,” she said. On the screen was a character dressed in white seated on the back of an ostrich with a […]
God’s Not Dead 2 (2016)
Twenty-four months ago, I had a certain amount of devilish joy in giving the business to a halfwit Christian film named God’s Not Dead, a movie so wrong-headed, so angry and so offensive that I eventually had even further devilish joy naming it the worst movie of 2014. It had nothing to do with its […]
By the Sea (2015)
Half an hour into By the Sea, I began to get the sinking feeling the movie was actually slowing down – and that was after a slow start. I’m not being mean, I’m serious. The movie started slow, then slowed to such a crawl that I almost expected the movie to come to a dead […]
Fantastic Four (2015)
Fantastic Four is a very dark movie. I mean, really dark. I mean dark, as in, somebody please flip some lights on. That’s not a joke; every scene in this movie is so under-lit that you feel like your wearing sunglasses indoors. Every outdoor scene feel you’re attending a vampire funeral. It is a funerary […]
The Gallows (2015)
There is a brief moment late into The Gallows that is so restrained and so steadily terrifying that I felt a great lurch in my stomach. Cassidy, the buxom cheerleader is trying to pull herself together after her boyfriend goes missing. She sits at the top the of stairs trying to pull herself together. The camera […]
The Pyramid (2014)
Right out of the gate, The Pyramid loses me. This is a movie about an ancient pyramid that is discovered buried under the sands of Egypt that is unusual in that it has only three sides excluding the base. That means it’s actually a tetrahedron. I have the strangest feeling that no one involved with […]
Annabelle (2014)
Okay, let’s talk about this stupid doll. It’s not scary. Yes, it’s creepy because it’s made to look creepy in a movie sort of way. That’s the wrong approach. Dolls are creepy only when they were made to be cute and innocent and you can clearly see that somebody at the drawing board needed to […]
